It’s suddenly really really sunk in that in a month I’ll be leaving this place.
As I’ve said before, there are things I will miss and things I won’t. I can’t deny that I will miss all the musicals (although this is probably more a London thing than Edinburgh) and the festivals… and the easy usage of debit cards and the stylish tailored coats. haha!
I just felt a surge of envy of the people I know who will be remaining here and I wondered if I shouldn’t do the same as well. After all, half the people back home expect me to have fallen head over heels for Edinburgh and to be dying to stay anyway. But… I don’t know. It would be fun – to some extent – to stay, I guess. Yet life isn’t all about fun and games. And I don’t feel like I’d be wanted or needed here either. *feeling vaguely teary-eyed for some reason*
I don’t know what’s in store for me in Malaysia, in the UK, or wherever. (The more I try to think about it the more headaches I get. And given how naturally worry-prone I am most of the time, that’s not good.) Gotta remind myself to just trust God. Always easier said than done, but one must try I suppose. Proverbs 3:5-6. Que sera, sera.
Conflicting emotions out of nowhere. Must be partly stress-induced.